Enter the Cyber Era

I went to my primary care physician today.  Since I have used them, maybe starting 2006 or 2007, they have had an electronic medical record.  They would print up a report on my report, so I had a copy of my record.   I liked that.

More recently, they have been able to electronically send my prescriptions to my preferred pharmacy. I like that!

Today, I set myself up to participate in their patient portal:  They will send me an email so I can access information about my visits.  I can email them for appointments, refills, and to ask questions.

They gave me options re: hard copy and letters (which is what they did in the past), text, voicemail and email. Email makes so much sense to me.  I am delighted with this new service.

I have not had a primary care physician I like this much since in the late 1970s.  Only then, they were called family practice doctors.  Things sure have changed.

Problems at Work

I had two very difficult situations at work this week, that I needed to deal with. I did not dive into them headlong, but spend some time thinking about them, and planning strategies to hopefully make them better.

I will tell you that that worked. I used to be the kind of person who dived headlong into a situation or problem. Now, I am the kind of person who thinks it through, does all of the preparation work, and then, dives in.  While I am doing the preparation work, I am chomping at the bit to dive in. But I restrain myself, telling myself how much better things are, when I have prepared properly.  I really believe in the value of preparation vs. unplanned action.

Random Thoughts

Maya Angelou http://mayaangelou.com/ died May 28, 2014.  I was going to write an entire blog about her, but realized that would be hypocritical.  I knew of her. I have read some of her poems.  I have watched her interviews and poetry readings on TV. But I am not well versed regarding her life, except to know that she was involved in the civil rights movement. I have told myself several times in the past that I want to read her best known work:  I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings.  I have put it off, sometimes, because I think it will be emotionally difficult.  But, I did put it on my reading list.

There was yet another mass shooting this week, this time in Santa Barbara, California.  The perpetrator, Elliot Rodger, was known to have mental health problems, and left video evidence of his pre-meditated act. Some of these have been removed https://www.youtube.com/user/ElliotRodger, because of their content. I saw one on TV. It was sick.

The father of one of the victims spoke out regarding these episodes, and that we need to be proactive to stop this horror https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u38LLKgp_f4.

The last time there was a mass murder, I contacted my Congressman, Randy Naughebauer, and Senators John Cornyn and Ted Cruz.  The responses I received were non-descript.  In other words, they were not concerned about gun control or improving mental health services.

Texas is a law and order state, a state's right state, a personal firearms state, and a state that does not believe in spending money for mental health care for the low income/indigent population. Our current governor rejects Federal money: not for economy stimulation, not for medicaid expansion, not for anything. (I resent this: I continue to pay my Federal taxes, but my governor prevents me from getting maximum return on my investment. When I tell Governor Perry supporters my view point, they are astounded to realize what they are missing out on!  Duh!  They are so blinded by states rights, that they do not see what benefits they lose.)

Once again, I will contact my representatives and express my concern about these issues.

Depending on where you are in West Texas, the rainfall amounts we have received since last Friday are from 3 to 5 inches. This is a blessing for farmers, especially dry land farmers. This rain did not dispel our drought/water restriction problems. But, it did help the fireworks vendors, as they may be able to sell fireworks without concern for a ban. This is a big industry for July 4th.

President Obama addressed the graduating class at West Point today. http://www.usma.edu/parents/SiteAssets/Graduation%20Activities%202014.pdf. or http://www.whitehouse.gov/blog/2014/05/28/america-must-always-lead-president-obama-addresses-west-point-graduates One of my coworkers was present. Her nephew was graduating. What a thrilling experience that must have been.

We have been blessed as a nation:  A civil rights activist died today, but the President addressing the United States Army Military Academy (West Point) is a man of color.  While he generally does not use the presidency as a bully pulpit, he has let it be known what it means, telling the general public, that to be a black man who might be "profiled" by police when a crime has been committed causes much anxiety, fear, paranoia, and concern that his rights will be violated.

The reality is this could happen.  Our law enforcement people do over react sometimes to race, color, gender. Our law enforcement people are put on the line, over and over, asked to make split second decisions, so many of their decisions should not be second guessed.  But sometimes, once a suspect is subduedand in custody, thingshappen, and our law enforcement officers need to be second guessed.

Memorial Day, and Honoring Our National Heroes

This was on PBS on Memorial Day:  http://video.pbs.org/video/2318014363/  If you did not see it, it is well worth watching.  It talks about how there was not a way to bury and acknowledge the war dead during the The War Between the North and the South (I purposefully chose not to call it the Civil War or the War of Northern Aggression), and how, out of that grew the national recognition we now have for our veterans, deceased and serving.

Amazingly, but understandably, the recording, remembrances, and honoring of the dead was most attributed to the slaves and freed slaves. Honoring the dead, black or white,  was more important to them than to the Anglos at the time.  Also, it was due to the hard physical labor of the blacks that the bodies of the deceased were dug up and re-interned or otherwise recognized.  We had much to learn from the culture of the Afro-Americans, even then, that we ignored.

But this time resulted in the establishment of National Cemeteries.  And the acknowledgement of the war dead as national heroes.  President Lincoln's Gettysburg Address: http://www.abrahamlincolnonline.org/lincoln/speeches/gettysburg.htm contributed so much to this recognition.

I agree with my niece it would be nice if we did not have to recruit and send our citizens in harm's way for the protection of our country.  Sometimes, as with the Native Americans, our efforts have been less than honorable.  Yet, also look at how many Native Americans have served the greater good of this nation.  Sometimes, with our more recent wars and conflicts, we have been the aggressors, often in an attempt to keep the aggression off our continent, or so we think. Do you want more attacks like the ones on the World Trade Center? Or the Pentagon? Or the airplane over Pennsylvania?

Although I would like to not have a military force and see us send our citizens in harm's way, I am a realist, and I am not sure that is possible.  And, harm's way can be recovery and rescue missions in the face of other types of tragedy as well as war: natural disaster, internal disruptive incidents of horrific result.  And, I am glad those forces are there to help when these incidents occur.

I am not ashamed to thank people for their military service on behalf of our country.  I also thank policemen, firemen, EMTs, and corrections officers.  We do not appreciate how important that is. I called the fire department a couple of years ago: At about 10 PM, my furnace motor burned up, and I was concerned that it might have started a smoldering fire in the heater closet. 911 dispatch  told me to vacate the house, and sent 3 fire trucks.  The firemen swarmed through my house, checked the heater closet, the pump outside, the electric line connections, the roof, the back yard, the fuse box (I had to go back inside to show them where it was) and the attic.  I apologized for the false alarm when nothing was found.  They told me they would much rather I call before I had a problem than wait till I woke up in the middle of the night with a problem. I took that sincerely.  I did not get a bill.  

Local police, county, state and national police (FBI) are the equivalent of the military forces in our country. What would happen if we had none of that in place, last year, on April 15, 2013, at the end of the Boston Marathon.  How do you prevent further destruction?  That broke my heart.   

We do not want to put lives on the line. But the reality is, lives are constantly being put on the line. Sometimes it is military, sometimes it police, fire, EMT.  Sometimes it is people who work on ambulance services, helicopter ambulances, and even teachers and social workers.

What I came away within from watching this show is that we are a nation that has learned a very difficult lesson, and have had to learn it more than once, that it is very important to acknowledge, recognize, honor and revere our public servants, no matter what role they have. We have learned to acknowledge them by monuments, cemeteries, ceremonies, rituals, medals.  Most recently, our communities have reached out and are starting to acknowledge them by special programs, services, and commerical and business options. 

Also, most recently I am aware of the scandal of the problems in the Veteran's Administration regarding of the veteran's health care system: http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/federal-eye/wp/2014/05/15/a-guide-to-the-va-health-care-controversy/.  I do not know the truths of the Veteran's Administration Health Care System.  I want to believe it is well intentioned. But this is not the first time the VA has had a black eye regarding veteran's health care. Note this story about Veteran's Health care in 2003 http://www.enquirer.com/editions/2003/05/25/loc_VAhealthcare.html.  The point is we constantly need to strive to be sure that our Veterans receive the benefits and assistance they truly deserve.

And, I am so proud that this is a part of our national heritage.  I am not familiar with other countries. I wonder how this is handled in other countries.  It may be better, and we may have more to learn from other countries.  It is my dearest hope we are doing everything we can to help and acknowledge our service providers.

Weather Radio

I have a weather radio.  I was checking the settings a while back, and thought I had it set up so I would hear the emergency weather and Amber Alert announcements.

But, for the longest time these past few months, it never made a sound.  That has been unusual in the time I have owned this radio. Well, a few days ago, it went off.

And, today, it went off.  We are under a tornado watch. Which basically means that the conditions are right for tornadoes to develop, there was not one currently in existence in our area.  The probability of tornado activity is low. But there.

It was bright and sunny earlier, but with clouds in the sky.  A while ago, the rain started, and it has become a harder rain. The thunder is fairly constant.

The rain is hard enough that it is causing some satellite interference in the television reception from the cable company. 

The local information is that we are almost "caught" up with rain amounts for the year. 

Memorial Day Commemoration

I went to the Memorial Day Service at the City of Lubbock Cemetery http://www.kcbd.com/story/25611710/memorial-day-service-to-be-held-at-city-of-lubbock-cemetery. There were 3 ceremonies at 10 AM today, and a Catholic Mass at 11 AM.  It is unfortunate they plan the ceremonies to conflict with each other, but it is good that there are plenty of options for people to attend.

The crowd was small today.  That may be a function of the other available options.  I think it may also have been a function of the overnight rain, and the continued rain clouds in the sky.  People in West Texas do not do rain well. 

The ceremony was brief.  A prayer, the posting of the colors, "The Star Spangled Banner", the Pledge of Allegiance, the featured speaker, who was on an Honor Flight, closing remarks, including recognitions, and the singing of "God Bless America."  The group was invited to join in, and we did.

The rains was noted as a blessing.  Veterans and their families were recognized.

I am watching the Red Sox vs. Braves on TV.  At 3 PM, Eastern Time, the game was halted for a moment of silence, and a commemorative video, per order of President Obama.  I thought it was a nice touch.

I will watch the Yankee vs. Cardinals game next.  

It is pretty out: grey, cool, but nice.

Memorial Day

I watched the National Memorial Day Concert http://www.pbs.org/national-memorial-day-concert/home/ on PBS tonight.  This was a very good but very emotional event.  The stories of surviving families, and veterans who survived or died in service were shared.  There was good music, appropriate patriotic music, and the rendition of the Services Medley always hits me hard https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3L9g1n25HdY.

So, I cried through much of this concert.  And, I had cried through much of the movie I saw earlier today.  My jaw was very sore by the end of the concert, a function of how I hold my mouth while I cry.

The tears are sad, happy, proud. 

Heaven is for Real

I went to see the movie, Heaven is for Real http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electric_chair today.  I had recently read the book.  The movie is based on the book, but a lot of artistic license was obviously taken with the movie.  It was an okay movie.  The message about near death experiences and what Heaven is, was good.  Some of the other stuff was a little weird.

As I recalled the book, I did not recall Reverend Burpo having the crisis of faith that was portrayed in the movie. But, I could be wrong. 

I am not sure how I feel about the way Heaven was portrayed.  I think they could have left that out and the movie would have been just as good. 

Hmmmm.  

The Death Penalty

Since the botched execution in Oklahoma http://www.cnn.com/2014/05/01/us/oklahoma-botched-execution/,  the death penalty has been in the news again.

Most recently, the State of Tennessee has resurrected the use of the electric chair http://www.cbsnews.com/news/tennessee-brings-back-electric-chair/

Really? The electric chair? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electric_chair The common myth is that Edison invented the electric chair to prove the dangers of alternating current.

The history of the electric chair includes that it has been considered cruel and unusual punishment.

I would consider it cruel and unusual punishment.

I am wondering if the various political and governmental organizations don't get it.  Drug companies do not want to participate in executions. So they are discontinuing their production of drugs that are used for these executions. 

Doesn't that raise a red flag to politicians and government officials?  If drug companies do not want to participate in government sanctioned executions, wouldn't you think that the governments involved would re-think these executions.

I am appalled that these governments are trying to circumvent these means of executions, and trying to find other ways to conduct lethal executions of criminals.

How sad.

Memorial Day Celebration

When I was growing up, my home town had a Memorial Day Parade.  As a Brownie and Girl Scout, I participated every year.  When I was no longer affiliated, I always went to watch the parade.

 

My home town had an American Legion Post and a Veteran's of Foreign Wars group. When I was young, we had the Millers Falls Drum and Bugle Corp, which marched in the parade. In addition to Scouts, the fire department marched. As did other local organizations.  The Boy Scouts put flags on the graves of veterans at the cemetery. The graves were marked with veteran's markers.

 

The parade started at the Ervingside park at the local war memorial, and proceeded to the cemetery.  At the bridge, crossing from Ervingside to Montague, the parade stopped.  There was usually a prayer, and a 21 gun salute.  Then, taps was played.  Not once, but twice. Once at the bridge, the second time in the distance.  It was a haunting rendition and somehow made the ceremony more solemn.

 

I have been to military honors burials, and many Memorial Day ceremonies in Lubbock.  The lack of the second distant rendition of taps leaves me wanting.

 

This year, as for the last 10 years, there is a Memorial Day Ceremony at the City of Lubbock Cemetery at 10 AM. I plan to be there.  Join me if you will.

 

http://www.ci.lubbock.tx.us/news-item/2014/05/20/default-calendar/memorial-day-service-at-the-city-cemetery

 

The Rains

Well, I went to sleep with the windows open and the air conditioner shut off. It was not as cool as I would have liked, and I had a restless sleep.  Some time in the early morning, I awoke to a shower.   I watched and listened, and then, it disappeared.

I could not sleep and moved to the sofa.  I slept. I awoke and the rain was persistent.  I took Sake to the vet, ran some errands and went to work. It was about 9:45 AM, and it was still raining. I am not sure when the rains stopped. When I left work, the sky was cloudy but not grey. The temperature was warm, but the breeze was brisk enough to cool the air.

Tonight, I have again opened the windows, but without the desired cooling effect, and I shut off the air conditioner, because it is not so warm I need it. 

We might get some rains tonight. My rain gauge registered 1.75 inches of rain, when I emptied it today.  The rain was not a torrent, so hopefully, as hard packed as the earth was, the kind of rain we had could penetrate.  Especially because it came in waves, none of which were torrents. Last night, the rain was straight down, and I did not need to close the windows. We shall see what, if anything happens tonight.

Phishing

I have three email accounts with Suddenlink. I no longer use one, but the other two are very active accounts for me.  

Tonight, I was in my secondary account, and I opened an email ostensibly from Suddenlink. It basically said that they wanted to verify that the account was still active, and to "click here" to verify the account. Well, I was going back and forth between both of my accounts tonight, and I did not get a similar email for my primary account.

This was suspicious. My secondary account is very active, so there was no reason to need to re-validate it (as if it had been inactive for a while, which I would understand.)

I called Suddenlink. The IT technician I spoke to was Lance.  He verified that Suddenlink had not sent anything to either of my emails, and it was most likely "phishing." He said that since I did not click on the link or give them my information, I probably was okay, but I it would not hurt to change my password. (I think I will do that, if I can figure out how.)

He took my information, said they would check into it and thanked me for reporting this, acknowledging that they probably have other customers who are being "phished" and they want to investigate it.

Microwave

For the second time in the not too distant past, I will be purchasing a microwave.   Several months ago (it was winter) I awoke one morning and my microwave was beeping "end" but there was nothing in it.  I am not sure what happened, including I could have absentmindedly taken something out of it and let it run empty.  A microwave no-no.

I purchased a Hamilton Beach Microwave.  I did not know that Hamilton Beach made microwaves, but I liked the look, the wattage, and the price.  Well, that was a mistake.  Almost from the start, there would be times that it ran but did not heat.  I would unplug it, let it reset, and it would start working. Finally, a couple of nights ago, it would not reset.  I tried a different outlet, thinking it might be an outlet problem, but to no avail. 

I use a microwave too much to not have a working unit.  However, meanwhile, I set up a steaming pot to heat things I would normally heat in the microwave. 

The worst thing about this is bothering to recycle the microwave.  I could just put it in the dumpster, but I try really hard to be a good environmental citizen, including recycling as much as I can.

The best thing about this is I set up the Hamilton Beach box in the kitchen. The cats love it, even when it is not laced with catnip!

The Rains

The rains have not come tonight. Yet. The air is still, cooling off, but not cool. And still.  There are rumbles of thunder and plenty of lightning. But, no rains.  In fact, the sky was cloudy in the early evening, but was clearing not so long ago. The weather radar has storms around, but none in Lubbock. 

The air is cooler outside than inside, but not enough to help the air conditioner. I have opened the windows, and shut off the air conditioner.  I hope it rains, but I am not looking for it to rain.

I Love Sticky Notes

I know you know what sticky notes are: The brand name is Post It Notes. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Post-it_note.  I use them for so many things   Tonight, I am using a Post It Note to help me to remember to turn the air conditioner back on in the morning.

I have opened the windows, as the outside temperature is about 4 degrees less than the inside temperature.  On a typical West Texas night, four or five degrees is the temperature difference that means that the inside will start to cool off.  Tonight, the 4 degree difference did not work, probably because of the extreme humidity in the evening air, and the fact that the wind is not very strong..

So, I turned off the air conditioner. The outside is making the house feel okay, but not to the extent the air conditioner can recognize it. 

As the night progresses, if the evening air does not cool the house off, I will close the windows and turn the air conditioner on again. For now, I want to see what natural cooling might occur.

The reason for the sticky note or Post It Note, is that in the morning, before  I go to work, I will close the windows that are opened in a locked position.  And, I need to remember to turn the air conditioner on again.

Snookered

Well, I was snookered today.  The air was so heavy with moisture today, I was hoping for sure for some rain. It mostly stayed to the west of Lubbock.  That is too bad. We are hoping for rain over the next few days.

I saw on the MLB website that the Yankees and Cubs were playing. I thought I saw that they were going to be on ESPN, but tonight, when I checked, it was the Dodgers and the Mets http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/official_info/broadcasts/national.jsp?tcid=mm_mlb_schedule.  I must have read the schedule wrong, but I am feeling snookered.

I decided to listen to music instead of watching baseball on TV.

Unusual Clouds Tonight

As I was out and about running errands tonight, I noticed the clouds in the sky. They were beautiful.  I saw a formation of clouds that I am not sure I have noticed before.  They were stacked round and puffed, sort of like a cream puff.  Or a buttermilk flake biscuit. Or a hamburger bun before the innards are added. Or a UFO saucer without the surrounding wing. Or a tall hockey puck, but with rounded edges. They were scattered at various places through out the sky.  And they held their shape, which tells me there was not much upper level wind disturbance.

I love to watch the sky and the clouds.  One of the most exciting things about living in West Texas is watching the weather move in.  It sounds mundane, but it is so fun to me.

I love the electric energy of an electric storm. But I am smart enough to know that I need to be inside when an electric storm moves in.  And the reality is, in West Texas, electric storms can quickly become severe weather with deadly lightning, damaging hail and destructive winds.  So, while I find weather this kind of weather exhilarating, I have learned to respect its power and destructiveness.

A Bonus Game

I have been tracking the Major League Baseball schedule of nationally televised games http://mlb.mlb.com/mlb/official_info/broadcasts/national.jsp?tcid=mm_mlb_schedule, so I will know when I might get to see a Yankee or Red Sox game.  I knew I was going to have the opportunity to watch the Yankees on Wednesday night. I did not pay much attention to the opponent. 

I planned to run some errands tonight. As it turned out, one needed to be done before tomorrow, so it made sense to do them all.  I got off work exactly at 5 PM, fed the cats, and left home a little before 6 PM to do my errands.

I did not rush. I did not think I had anything to rush home to do.  I purchased a couple of new hoses for the back yard, and I was not sure I was going to put them out tonight, or wait.  We may get some rain later in the week, so I may not need to water.  My days to water are Tuesday and Friday, given our current restrictions http://www.ci.lubbock.tx.us/departmental-websites/departments/water-department/water-restrictions, but I mostly hand water or use soaker hoses, so I can water anytime.

The problem with my current hoses is one leaks at the connections.  I tried to get replacement connections, but that did not help.  The other is cracked and leaks unpredictably wherever.  So, it was time for new hoses.

Well, when I got home, I needed to sit to rest my back and turned on the TV.  Flipping through the channels, I found the Yankee vs. Cubs game on WGN http://wgntv.com/. So, that is a bonus game for me.

Looking at the schedule, I should get to watch a Red Sox and a Yankee game on Memorial Day.  That is great!

Spell Check and Typing

So, I am not the most accurate typist there is.  Many of my typos are "dyslexic," meaning that I interchange letters.  Most word programs correct that for me, and I have become lax with spell checking, although I try to remember to spell check these posts before I release them

The problem is, I used to be a very good speller, but now I am a lazy speller.  Especially for words that were always questionable to me. For example, I can never remember if occasion has 2 c's and 2 s's or 2c's and 1 s or 1 c and 2 s's. Well, I used spell check so I have it correct here. But that has always been a problem word for me.

The other thing I do is put spaces in the wrong place.  So "the neat man" might become "then eat man." Which of course, makes some or little sense.  Depending on the word program I am using, it might point out the syntax is incorrect, it might not.   

The point is, spelling is a skill like so many others.  If you do not use it, you lose it. I read a lot, so that helps me with my spelling, but I have to work on consciously being aware of my spelling.

Gasoline Prices

I am sure I have written about gasoline prices before.  Last Saturday, when I filled up the gas tank, gasoline prices were in the $3.26/gallon range, depending upon where the gasoline was purchased. During the week, as I go to and from work, I pass two self-serve gas stations.  One is usually on the front edge of changes: if their prices change, I can count on every one's prices changing.  The other is in line with price changes in the community, but their price changes occur after everyone else's have, not at the forefront.

Well, by mid-week, both were advertising gasoline prices at about $3.44/gallon. About two days later, their prices were done by about $.08.  This weekend, when I purchased gasoline, I payed $3.19/gallon.  I do not understand this wild and wide price fluctuation in gasoline prices.  It makes no sense to me.

Maybe someone can explain it to me.  

Electronic Equipment

I have a printer/scanner/copier that has been giving me fits for about the last year. I am not sure when I purchased this printer, I think sometime between 2003 and 2005. So, it is well used and has done its due.

Finally, it stopped copying and scanning. The last color cartridge I had did not seem to have any blue in it.  I cannot tell that the current color cartridge has anything in it, buy all I tried to print today was brown.  I researched getting it repaired, which involved sending it off to Hewlett Packard in an original carton(I can order a carton if need be) and waiting for the repair.

A few weeks ago, I saw a Hewlett Packard printer/scanner/copier at Wal-Mart.  The cost of the printer was less than what it costs me to replace the ink cartridges of my current printer.  I did not buy it at the time, but after the most recent round of printing problems, I purchased one this weekend.  I will use the printer I have as long as I can, until the ink runs out. Then, I will switch.  I wanted this printer because, although I have a wireless network in my home, I am not sure I have the secure code for the network. The printer I purchased has a hard-wired hook up. I do not know if the wireless printers allow for a hard-wired hook up, but now, I do not need to worry about that.

The other things is the new printer will use ink cartridges that cost about $33, or about half what I had been paying for my current printer. So, it seems like a good move.  I had struggled with not having a copier for small things.  I do not do much scanning to the hard drive, but as I understand the copying process, scanning is involved.

I do not recall how much I paid for the old printer.  I am thinking it was in the $350 range, but it may have been more.  It is amazing how much technology has improved and how much the prices have decreased!

One Little Detail

I like to do puzzles.  I like jigsaw puzzles, but with the cats, I do not have a set up that I could use to start and leave a puzzle unfinished without the cats getting into it.  That is okay. I do a daily online jigsaw puzzle. I know with jigsaw puzzles, sometimes placing a certain few pieces can make a difference in completing the puzzle.

I love word puzzles:  jumbles, anagrams, crossword puzzles, acrosstics.  I will do word searches.  And I like fill in crosswords.  I think I have previously mentioned that until I went to work at my current place of employment, I did not understand that word puzzles could be a team sport.  Of course, they can. But they can also be an individual activity.

So often when working these puzzles, I can be stumped until I solve one little thing, one or two clues, and then everything else falls into place.

I do a lot of puzzles on line every day, and regularly work a paper acrosstic.

I have found a couple of sites for online crosswords.  I usually use the expert setting, that does not let me know if I have made an error as I am filling in an answer. Sometimes, I am stumped, and have to go to the regular level to find my errors, and correct them.

But at the expert setting, there is no such help.  So, after I complete a puzzle, and all the blanks are filled, and the puzzle does not indicate I have successfully completed it, I have to go back through and check it.  Sometimes, it is a stupid typo on my part. Sometimes, it is a questionable answer. Sometimes, I do not know the answer, and have to get help from the regular level.

The point is, I have to recheck every answer.  And, it does not matter how many correct responses I have made, if there is just one letter that is incorrect, I have not completed the puzzle correctly.

This is a lesson in life. There are many times in life when one little thing that is incorrect can effect us so that nothing appears to be correct.  This can be frustrating and discouraging, especially because we live in a society in which the majority rules and predominately right or correct is acceptable.  But that is not always so.

So often, everything must be correct for the situation.  This is true in health care. This is true in accounting, bookkeeping.  And, in reality in mechanics:  if all things are not in alignment, one thing off can and probably will effect other mechanical parts so things are not right.

Our bodies are much more forgiving than mechanical devises.  But it is amazing that if one thing is off in our body, so many other things are affected:  A joint out of alignment requires an adjustment by the rest of the body. This means the body moves, reacts, responds in a way that is not usual to its working, and other joints and muscles are affected, ache, hurt, inflame, are sore, or are injured.. 

There is a story about how one grain of sand, in a shoe, can impact a journey, by wearing away on the foot of the walker.

Those of us who are obsessive-compulsive endure derision because of our attention to detail. But some of us have had the experience that when we did not pay attention to detail, things did not go smoothly. 

So, for me, I ignore the derision and enjoy my sense of well being when I pay attention to detail and feel confident of the situation because of my attention to detail.

It is amazing to me how one little detail can put a very complex puzzle into perspective. But it can.  And, I am content to try to work on that one little detail.

Weather Change

Yesterday, May 11, 2014,  was warm but windy http://www.weather.com/weather/today/Lubbock+TX+79413?from=hp_promolocator&lswe=79413&lwsa=Weather36HourInterstateCommand.  Overnight, a cold front blew in.  I awoke to cold weather but not a cold house. However the winds were blowing dust into the house, so I felt I had to close the windows, in spite of the wonderfully cooling night air.

It was chilly this morning.  I even dragged out my winter coat.  Although the air temperature was 48°, the walk across the parking lot at work, at that temperature, with a cold North wind indicated to me I would be more comfortable with my winter coat, than a lightweight spring coat.  I was right.

When I left work tonight, I was not too hot in my winter coat, but I did not need to wear it while driving home.

I opened the windows early this evening. The cooling air is wonderful. It is refreshing and pleasant. There does not seem to be too much dust in the air, but of course, as it grew dark, I could not tell if there was the faint silt that sometimes floats through the air.

Since I am not coughing or sneezing, I am thinking that the wind has not started blowing the dust tongiht. I hope I can enjoy the chill of the night to cool the house and make for sleeping under covers that are warming and snuggling.

I Do Not Believe in Coincidences

I do not believe in coincidences.  I read a lot of murder mysteries, and the protagonists are always saying this.

But just because it is a platitude, it does not mean it is not true. Most recently this past year, at work, I happened to be in the chow hall at the same time as a volunteer Chaplain, who had volunteered at the unit for 18 years, and whom I had never met.  She invited me to eat with her and we had a great talk.  It was a blessing to meet her and learn about her work in the regional medical center.

A few weeks ago, a nurse I do not usually sit with joined me for lunch.  Near the end of lunch, she confided that her cousin had recently committed suicide. We talked for some time.  One thing we discussed was that her aunt was not sure about what kind of service, or doing any service.  I confided with her regarding some of my past experiences with suicide. I talked to her about the presumption of regret right before death, and that God would then forgive someone and welcome that person into Heaven. 

Ever the social worker, I found some local resources for her and, since her cousin lived elsewhere, resources where he lived.

Later that week, I checked on the nurse.  The memorial service had been the day before, and she was eager to discuss it with me.  I was honored to listen.  It had helped a great deal in the healing process.

Well, today, I was thinking about grits when Chef Jeff http://www.chefjefflive.com/ came on TV with a recipe for grits. I have frequently seen the Chef Jeff segments on TV, but did not pay much attention to who he was or what his story was.  Until today.  I went looking for his recipe, and learned about his background.  He was a cocaine kingpin, went to federal prison, and grew up, grew responsible and learned a trade in prison:  cooking.

As a social worker in a prison, I am always looking for a good role model for the offenders with whom we work.  An ex-felon who makes good is a plus as a good role model.  Jeff Henderson has a new book: If you Can See it, You Can Be It.   He has two other books: Cooked: My Journey from the Street to the Stove and Chef Jeff Cooks:  In the Kitchen with America's Inspirational New Culinary Star http://www.amazon.com/Cooked-My-Journey-Streets-Stove/dp/0061153915/ref=la_B001JS3E78_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1399842132&sr=1-1.  

Apparently, the last book is more of a cookbook, but I will read the other two for sure.

The point is, if I was not thinking about grits, and Chef Jeff was not presenting a recipe about grits, I would not have learned of his past, and the potential to use him as a role model for my patients.

Grits

I have acquired the taste for a number of southern and Tex-Mex foods in the 37 years I have lived in West Texas.  Among one of my favorites for breakfast is grits.  Usually I fix grits on a weekend morning, and like to eat them with cheese and butter.  

I was just thinking about grits this morning as I watched Daybreak Today on KCBD http://www.kcbd.com/, when In the Kitchen with Chef Jeff came on.  And lo and behold, he was cooking grits http://www.inthekitchenwithjeff.com/#!recipe-backup-/coc9.  Specifically, he was cooking grits and andouille sausage. I decided for sure I wanted grits for breakfast.  While I happened to have andouille sausage, I had bought it for jambalaya, and decided not to use it for breakfast.  But the idea of frying up some onion and garlic to add to the grits sounded good to me. So, in addition to butter and cheese, the grits I had today had onions and garlic in them. And they were very, very good.  I will have to remember to do that again.  Chef Jeff suggested smoked cheese.  I did not have any, but I often buy smoked cheese.  I can see how that would add to the recipe.  Yummy!

Smells in the Pantry

Saturday is grocery shopping day.  I had a coupon to get Meow Mix food cups http://meowmix.com/products/. I buy these from time to time, but usually just one or two. I bought several today because of the coupon.  There were two varieties available at the store that I thought my cats would like and could handle: tuna and shrimp or beef and chicken. In the past, I have seen other varieties.  I have long learned that any variety with salmon is too rich for Sake.  The other cats may or may not eat it. Sake will eat it, she likes salmon, but then she vomits. Usually my cats do not care for a beef variety, but they will eat a beef combination with chicken variety.

As is usual, I returned home from the store and placed the various items I purchased in the "pantry," a little closet in my kitchen I use for food storage.

Sometime in the afternoon, Take sat at the edge of the pantry door, with her nose in the closet. She looked like she was in time out.  But she was definitely checking out something. I could not tell what was attracting her senses to entice her to sit there.  After a while, she moved on.

A couple of hours later, Sake sat at the same pantry door, and was sniffing.  This was too strange not to be coincidental. So, I watched her closely.  She was sniffing at the Meow Mix cup of tuna and shrimp.

I put this out for Sake, and she ate minimally at it. But it attracted Taki, who was very polite and watched Sake eat. It also attracted Haiku, who just sat at the feeding area I have for the cats.  After Sake finished, I split the rest of the food in two dishes, and both Haiku and Taki ate the shrimp and tuna mixture. 

Although Sake did not eat much, I am thrilled at finding another food that she will eat, even if sparingly.

I am just amazed that the cats could smell the food through the packaging.  I wonder if the people at Meow Mix have planned this.  But of course they did.

Breakfast on Demand

Saturday and Sunday, I allow myself to sleep in but the timing on that is variable. Friday evening, May 9th, 2014, I went to the Catholic Charities Volunteer Appreciation event http://www.cclubbock.org/.  Although I returned home before 8:30 PM, it took some time for the event hype to wear off and for me to wind down. It was about 1:30 AM when I went to bed. 

That was okay by me. I slept in Saturday morning. Haiku and Taki were giving me signals that it was time to get up well before the alarm went off at 5:30 AM.  I shut the alarm off, and went back to sleep

At 8:18 AM (I checked the clock) Sake started slapping me.  You will remember that Sake is the cat who has been ill and does not eat well in my presence. She has not eaten well since Tuesday, and it was Saturday morning. (I know she eats throughout the day, though, sometimes well, some times just nibbling.)

I got up and started feeding cats. Sake was so hungry, she jumped on the kitchen counter and started eating the newly cut up chicken in her dish. This is the same cut up chicken she has been snubbing this week until Friday evening. 

I was so pleased that she ate well today. I do not understand the waxing and waning of her appetite. Suffice it to say she is an old lady, and she can do what she wants. I try to offer her a variety of foods so she has something she will eat. This may or may not work.

I wish Sake would let me brush her more, but she does not, and she has lots of bad mats.  But I do what I can. She hides so much when she is not feeling well. So, when she is out, I do not want our time together to be a total war of the mats, me trying to brush her, and her hating it. I do a little, but she calls the shots.

So, when she calls the shots for breakfast, no matter the hour, even too early, I abide by her wishes.

Natural Cooling

So, one of the characteristics of living on the South Plains is that at this time of the year, when the sun goes down, the air cools very quickly. One of the consequences of this is that if you can open your windows, the night air will cool your house without the use of air conditioning.

Some several years ago, I had purchased replacement windows that allowed me to open them easily. I can open them in a "locked" position, so it would be very difficult for a thief, robber, or general mayhem instigator to enter my home through a window.

This has been a boon to me. I love sleeping with the fresh air coming into my home.  When I first bought my home, and Mack, the dog I so loved was still alive, I would frequently sleep in the back yard on a lounge chair on these wonderful cool nights.Mack loved to be in the back yard, no matter the weather. I relied on him to warn me of potential problems, and he did.  Unless the mosquitoes bothered him he loved to be outside in the yard. Without a dog to warn me of trouble, and with the increase of crime in my neighborhood, I no longer feel safe spending the night in my back yard. I will stay out late, sometimes, but I will not sleep in the yard.

Well, tonight is one of those nights. It is very late, but I am thankful I can open my windows in a locked position and the fresh air will blow in.  It is cooling the house. What a blessing.  I love the fresh air of West Texas.

My Dying Printer

I am not sure how old my printer/scanner/copier is.  It may be 9 years old. It may be older. I cannot recall.  What I do know is that it is not doing so good. Several months ago, it stopped scanning items which eliminates the ability to scan items into the computer, which I rarely did, and making copies, which I frequently did.

I could send it back to Hewlett Packard for repair, but for between $50 and $100 dollars, I could buy another printer/scanner/copier.  I will eventually choose the latter option. I still have ink cartridges for the printer I have, so I hope to use those up before I replace the printer. Two printer cartridges for the machine I have cost more than a new printer!

In the meantime, I have to find a way to convince the printer that I do not need it to repeatedly align the cartridges, which prevents me from using it as a printer. I worked at it for a while, and got there. For how long, I do not know.

We do what we can.

I hate that so much of our technology is so outdated so quickly.  I had a lawn mower for 25 years, and a washer and dryer for 20 years.  I have a vacuum cleaner that I purchased in 1984.  I can no longer purchase filter bags for it, and the power head does not work, but the suction part still works, and I just keep emptying the filter bag. I do not use it for regularly for house cleaning, but I do use it for really nasty stuff.  Also, I still use it as a blower, because my upright vacuum does not allow for "blowing."

I hate planned obsolescence.  It is a disrespectful strategy by manufacturers and producers.

My father was a handyman of sorts, and repaired all kinds of small appliances and machines. As I child, I could earn $5 by dismantling and cleaning a box or room fan that was dirty and not running.  My cleaning efforts would restore the fan to working condition.  I remember, years ago, that some friends of ours had a box fan that stopped working. They were ready to throw it out.  I told them I could fix it.  I took it apart, cleaned it and restored it to working condition.  They fed myself and my now ex-husband dinner for my efforts!

The point is, much of what is manufactured today has a planned obsolescence factor.  This is because we are developing new technology all the time. But this is also because manufacturers want to keep selling new stuff, and if the old stuff still works, there is no reason to buy new stuff.   If I suspect that in a product, I try to avoid the product.

National Association of Letter Carriers Food Drive

I am not sure how often this happens, I think at least once a year.  The National Association of Letter Carriers http://www.nalc.org/commun/foodrive/ has a food drive along their mail delivery routes.  In Lubbock, Texas, the South Plains Food Bank http://www.spfb.org/ is the recipient of their collections. 

This is a great idea. We can just buy donations and the letter carriers take them away for the food pantry/food bank. 

The South Plains Food Bank http://www.spfb.org/ is an amazing organization.  They collect and distribute food for many people who need help with food. They have an after school feeding program, a food stamp program, an orchid, a youth program, and a farm. They have the Breedlove Dehydration  Plant http://breedlove.org/ that allows for providing dehydrated food internationally as well as locally. 

Today, there was a bag in my mail box in which I can put donated food for the letter carrier to gather up.  I will get something to donate when I buy groceries Saturday morning. The letter carrier will come by some time Saturday afternoon, and my donation will be out there. 

I appreciate the opportunity to participate.

Buying a book

I love books. But I usually do not buy books, because I am faced with a moral dilemma about what to do with the book when I have read it.  I do not want to get rid of books, but in the last few years, I have decided that if I am not going to read the book again, I have an obligation to pass it on to someone else. So, I have given books away, or donated them to a thrift store.

Sometimes, I read a book and I know I want to keep it. So after I read the book, I purchase a copy. 

I rarely buy hardcover new books or best sellers.  But, tonight, I did just that:  I am a member at Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/.  For special weekends, they usually have a 20% off coupon, and Mother's Day weekend was no exception. Also, many new releases or best sellers are discounted to members up to 40%.  The Closer http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-closer-mariano-rivera/1116816290?ean=9780316400756 was no exception. I was able to get a good deal on the book. It is the story about Mariano Rivera, and his life, and remarkable tenure as the closer for the New York Yankees. 

I have many library books stacked in my living room. I will be travelling for vacation later this year, and I may save The Closer for when I travel.

This is Mystery Book Club Nite

Tonight is mystery book club night.  A group of us usually meet to eat before the book club, then head on to the Barnes and Noble for the meeting. Which his what we did tonight. The book we read for tonight is Murder at the Breakers by Alyssa Maxwell http://www.alyssamaxwell.com/#!books/cnec.  The general consensus was the book was fun to read.  I have been to Newport and the Breakers. There is one other member of the group who has been to Newport and the Breakers. We agreed it was fun to read a mystery about places we had been.  I could imagine the narrow, windy streets of Newport.  One of the members researched the Vanderbilt family history, and confirmed the veracity of the Vanderbilts, and that they even had a distant relative with the last name of Cross, the last name of the book protagonist.  So that was neat!

We have read several "sweet" mysteries with historical content.  So we selected a different type of book for June.  The selection is Close to the Bone by Stuart MacBride http://www.stuartmacbride.com/. I have read another book by him, Cold Granite.  It was darker and deeper than some books I read, but it was good.  I will miss the June meeting because of previous plans, but I will read the book.  It has been my intention to read more of Stuart MacBride's books.

Handyman-itis: I Get It Finally

A male someone I know told me that guys like to have tools and gadgets and equipment and that those things are guy toys.  The bigger the better.  I think this is generally observed to be true.  There is something said about the "the bigger the boy, the bigger the toy." 

Over the years I have had occasion to call upon handymen to get minor chores done around the house.  One time, I had a disconnected satellite dish on the roof, and it flopped over the eave. I arranged with a handyman to come by and dismount it. I planned to stay home from work, so I could pay him.  Well, it was raining that day, and he did not show up (no kidding.) So a couple of days later, I got home from work and the disc was removed:  They had put a ladder on the front of the house, climbed the roof, and did the deed on the roof at the back of the house.  He eventually called me to get paid.  He wanted to come by "sometime Saturday morning" to get the check, but could not give me a specific time.  We agreed that I would write a check and "hide" it on my front porch.  I ran errands, got home, and the check was still in hiding.  Later that day, he came by and I gave him the check. He was almost cavalier about whether or not he got paid.  I think the thrill of the almost clandestine escapade was a reward for him!

A couple of years later, I was taking bids to get a tree cut down. I had several bids, and a couple of the bidders seemed unreliable.  This same handyman was someone I called.  He remembered doing work for me before. He was so excited about doing the job, and getting the equipment in that would be needed for the job.  It scared me a little.  I thought he was too fanatical and unrealistic about the plan.  He was so hyped!  I did not get it.  His bid was much lower than the tree company I eventually used. 

The tree company was professional, calm, and very authoritative about what would be required to remove the tree.  I almost went with the handyman, but his fervidness put me off. I should have seen it for what it was:  excitement at getting to play with big toys!  Oh well, that lessen cost me a higher fee than the handyman would have charged. But I had every confidence that the tree removal service I engaged would remove the tree without dropping it on my roof, or my neighbor's roof, and do the clean up afterwards.  They did just that. I was not sure about the handyman, because he was literally licking his lips to get the job and play with big toys and risky tasks!

Last week, I had the bathroom remodelled.  The guys doing it were very good: professional, considerate, communicative about what was happening, consistent, prompt. They paid attention to my concern about not letting a cat escape. They wiped their feet before they came into the house. They checked about appliances before they tried circuit breakers to find the one they needed

They noticed little extras that they fixed.  When I told them I talked to the contractor about getting towel racks installed later, they said I could call them directly to do that. 

Well, the owner/contractor called me Monday to set up a time for the men to come to my house and install the towel rack. We set upon noon Tuesday.  I got home and sure enough, a crew showed up a few minutes after noon.  There were two guys. Not the two guys who did the remodelling work. These to guys came into the house each carrying a tool kit.  They assessed the job, and made two or three more trips to their truck to get additional equipment.

Mind you, they both had tool belts loaded with stuff:  I am not sure what, but cell phones, and tape measures were obvious.

Now, I could probably install towel racks.  I would do it with a pencil, a drill and bits, wall anchors, hammer, tape measure, screwdrivers.  I would have probably bought a stud finder to do this.  But, I had visions of me making unnecessary holes in the walls, newly replaced, re-textured and painted. 

I realized today what the allure of being a handyman is:  These guys get to "fix" things.  They get to play with tools, and gadgets. The more tools they can use, the better. The bigger tools they get to use, the better.  If they have to go out and buy a special tool, that is "cool."  The more "different" stuff they get to do, the better.

I am not sure that being a handyman is a high dollar lucrative business. But, it allows someone to be his own boss, set his schedule in cooperation with his clients, and play with really cool tools and gadgets. Wow!  I get it. I think it is a guy thing. 

I know that there are some handyperson services out there staffed by women. They emphasize competence, reliability, professionalism.  I wonder if they get off on playing with tools the way guys do.

Okay, so this is a very sexist blog entry. 

But it really does point out the difference between they way men and women approach tasks and chores.  There is nothing wrong with that difference. We are just different.  But, as long as we are dedicated to doing a good job, it does not matter.  What matters is the dedication to doing a good job.

A Nice Surprise

As I was driving home tonight from work, I got a call from Jerry Parrish at Gill Construction.  He agreed to call me back. He said he would be in the neighborhood, and if I had not mailed the check, he would come by for it.  I told him I did mail the check this morning.

He also asked about mounting towel racks.  I was surprised that he followed up with that small detail.  We set up a time for Tuesday to get that done. 

I am again and again pleased with their customer service!

Take Me Out To The Ball Game

The Chicago Cubs are celebrating 100 years at Wrigley Field.  On May 4, 2014, the game is being broadcast on ESPN, and the announcers are broadcasting from the bleachers http://chicago.cubs.mlb.com/news/article.jsp?ymd=20140430&content_id=73837206&vkey=pr_chc&c_id=chc.  I would not normally watch a Chicago Cubs vs. St. Louis Cardinals baseball game.  But this is a "throwback" game. They are wearing vintage uniforms, and celebrating the hundred year anniversary of the ball park.

The announcers realized almost immediately that they had to deal with shadows and sun.  There were exposed to possible baseballs from the field.  They did have food brought to them by the stadium staff. They did have their gloves, in case they could catch a ball hit to them.

At the 7th inning stretch, they led the singing of "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" and recruited a child fan to to say "lets score some runs."  The announcers had worried about singing, and knowing the words. They worried about getting it right.  They did get it right.

This has been a special celebration, and I have enjoyed watching the game, although I am neither a Cardinal nor a Cubs fan.

Remodelling done!

The remodelling was finished on Friday.  It took the plumber longer than he expected to be able to connect the lines to the sink without leakage.  But finally, it was done.  He gave me his number in case there was still a leak.

My bad, I did not plan for towel racks.  I checked with the contractor and he said to get some and let him know so he could send someone out to install them.  The worker at the house said just to call him directly.

By Friday, Sake and Haiku were basically okay with the workmen coming and going, They would slink around and check with me, but also come and go as they wanted.  Taki was still not sure.  She did growl in the morning at traffic, and when the workmen arrived.  But, when they were not making noise, she would come out and check it out, but scamper away the minute they made some noise.

I am satisfied with the results, and glad this is over with.  The contractor said if he could get by Saturday, he would, so I could pay him, otherwise, I should mail the check with the agreed upon adjusted amount.

When I contracted to have windows installed in 2007, it was a horrible experience, and it only lasted two days. I regretted using the contractors I used.  This was a week long experience and it was fine. What a difference using a business that is professional and well versed in what they know to do.

Day Four of Remodelling

Oh, remodelling has continued.   Sake has just accepted the comings and goings of the remodellers.  Haiku gets upset sometimes because of the intrusion or noise, and was shaking Wednesday, but was calmer today.

I have been reading a lot, and she does better sitting on me when I am reading. That reassures her.  But she is still concerned, and nervous.

Taki was so upset, she hid under the sofa yesterday, and again today.

Yesterday and today, Sake and Taki sat in the living room watching the front door, waiting for the remodellers to arrive.  I think Sake is interested in who is in the house.  Taki would growl at any outside noise: a car going down the street, or the remodeller's truck driving into the driveway.  But then, she would slink away.

The remodellers took a break midday to let the walls dry so they could sand, and run some errands.  The door was off the bathroom, and I had to constantly watch Haiku and Taki to keep them out of the bathroom. They both like to be in the bathroom with me when I am in there, so it is no surprise to me that they wanted to check it out.  I missed Taki at one point, and found her in the bathroom. Her scampering away let me know that she knew she should not be in there.  I will make it right for her later.

The remodellers are in hopes they will finish sometime tomorrow morning. I am in hopes they finish sometime tomorrow. 

They have been very good.  They discovered some additional work that was not initially estimated, but I agree needed to be done. I had an additional plumbing problem they managed for me. 

I have enjoyed my week off.  I have done a lot of computer work, some yard work, some house work, and a lot of reading. I have run some errands, and went to work Wednesday for a couple of hours.  It has been relaxing for me.  I am not stressed about the torn up bathroom, or the cost or the time.  I am just chilling and going with the flow.

We shall see how things resolve.

The Death Penalty

I am against the death penalty.  I will discuss that further along in this blog.  I live in a state, Texas, that executes as many if not more people than any other state in the United States.  I work as a contract worker for the Texas Department of Criminal Justice (TDCJ).  I am a social worker. I work for Texas Tech Health Sciences Center, which has a contract through Correctional Managed Health Care to provide services to TDCJ.

I understand that TDCJ is charged with housing offenders on death row, and executing their death sentences as prescribed by law.  I understand that TDCJ is charged with these tasks.  I have understand that TDCJ has to follow the law. I have every moral objection to the law..

I have an objection with the legislators and voters of the State of Texas who have voted in and continue to support the death penalty.

There are many reasons I oppose the death penalty.  One is the very possibility of what happened in Oklahoma on April 29, 2014 http://www.npr.org/2014/04/30/308377785/botched-oklahoma-execution-mobilizes-death-penalty-opponents. The drugs did not act as they should have, and even the offender said that something was wrong.  He later died of a heart attack, after an agonizing time of reaction to the drugs.

Over the past few years, drug companies who make the drugs used in the lethal injections for death penalties have decreased or eliminated the availability of these drugs.  While I find that admirable, I am aware that these same drug companies make unimaginable profits on drugs that are essential to the lives of many people, sometimes pricing those drugs out of reach of the patients who need them, thus giving them death penalties.  I know that there are some assistance programs from drug companies who help people who cannot afford their medications.  But this is very complex and requires some help to negotiate the system.  But, it is there

But this is just one of my objections to the death penalty.

My objection to the death penalty is on a larger, wider, moral scale.   I think that no matter how heinous the crime, how despicable the person, how habitual the offense, it is not up to me or any other human being to decide that this person should die.  I find "playing god" offensive to my sense of what is moral and ethical.

I think that I can say this with some sense of equanimity.  I have dealt with people who are murderers, child rapers, abusers of the elderly, arsonists, animal abusers.  No matter how despicable  their crimes were, or how despicable their behaviors are, I am reminded over and over again that the offenders are still human beings.  My faith, my belief in humanity, my social work code of ethics reminded me that they are human beings who deserve dignity and respect in my professional interaction with them.

It is not up to me to decide if this person lives or dies. That is beyond my purview as a social worker in my current job position. I know I could not serve on a jury panel in a trial in which the defendant faced the death penalty.

Years ago, I was doing groups at my place of employment, and a very controversial execution was in the news. The offenders in this group wanted to talk about that, and not the topic of the day, so we discussed the execution.  The general consensus of these offenders was that it is not up to the state or the court system to decide the death penalty. It should be up to the offender. They were in agreement that some crimes should be punished by life and by life without parole. But they said it should be up to the offender if he wanted his life ended by a death penalty.  They were not talking about suicidality. They were talking about taking a choice of death over life long punishment.

Frankly, I would have a better time accepting that option than the state mandated death penalty, imposed by judge or jury.  I have met offenders who know that because of the length of their sentence, they will never leave prison alive.  That is a depressing and discouraging acknowledgement of their life circumstances.  It is understandable that they are depressed, and see no way out of their depression.  

My job is to help them to find what their role of life in prison is:  to help younger offenders deal with accepting or adjusting to incarceration; to help other lifers find their place and role in prison; to find their peace and place with their maker, to improve themselves as persons so they rise above the person who committed their crime.  I don't know. There may be other roles these offenders might have to find or develop to address their reason for life in prison.

I am so inadequate at helping a long term or life term offender find his role for his life in prison.  I cannot define it for him. I can think of things that might help: getting involved in prison ministries; teaching other offenders, especially in terms of good decision making and understanding consequences; peer support of offenders; changing thinking to be compliant with accepted social rules. 

The whole point of this blog is that we, as human beings have no right to decide that someone should suffer the death penalty, no matter how heinous his crime, no matter how "humane" the administration of the means of death.

Life is sacred. Life a miracle. The giving and taking of life is a function beyond my capacity as a human being. It is a function of my higher power, my God, my maker. It is not a function held by man, although mankind acts as if it is.