Normally, when I am working on the computer, I like to have something on TV, or the radio, or music to listen to. Tonight, I do not want any background noise. I am not feeling well. I cannot say exactly what is wrong with me except that I hurt in my joints, and I am very tired. The joint pain makes sense, we are going through yet another weather change, and I am convinced it is not the change in temperature that causes my joint pain, but the change in barometric pressure.
I am not sure why I am so tired. I have been sleeping well, even to the extent that I slept in over the weekend. Granted, a couple of nights last week, I did not sleep well, but by Thursday I was doing better, and should be "caught up" if one can catch up with sleep.
I am experiencing some pain on my right side/hip/back/what have you. It is stressful to me, because it does not totally go away. Some days, I wake with pain. Many days, I have increasing pain with increased activity. There are certain physical therapy exercises that diminish my pain, but it returns soon, the same or the next day. I am struggling with this. I am not sure where to turn. I am going to physical therapy, but the standard exercises increase my pain or give me no relief. At least the physical therapist recognizes that.
I have an emotional component to my pain that has not been there before. Just thinking about my pain makes me miserable, emotionally. I feel unsafe on my feet in certain circumstances: wet tiles, icy walk ways to name a few.
I am emotionally fragile: Patriotic music or activities bring tears to my eyes. Experiences of solidarity, communion and faith bring tears to my eyes. Sweet stories bring tears to my eyes. I am not sad. I am just overwhelmed by my feelings.
This is a more personal blog than I normally put on the computer. I am going to take the risk and publish it.
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