Three Cats

It took three cats to get me out of bed Monday morning, and even at that, I arose very late, and was late for work.  I had a very dark night, Sunday night. 

It is amazing to me what impacts me. I read a lot of mysteries, often well into the night.  I read about blood and guts and gore; home invasions; beatings; murders; death and dying; kidnappings; and all kinds of sinister doings.  What I read rarely effects my ability to sleep.

I watch a lot of serious TV: Lockup, Bones, NCIS, CSI, Law and Order to name a few. I watch very little comedy.  I watch PBS: Downton Abbey, Call the Midwife, Doc Martin,  Antiques Roadshow. I watch the History Channel a lot: Pawn Stars and Modern Marvels, The Story of Us or Man or whatever, How the States Got Their Shapes among others. I watch The Weather Channel a lot.  I do not watch much of their serial programming, although I did like How Weather Changed History.  But, I get a lot of my news and sports from The Weather Channel.

Sometimes, I watch movies.

But, Sunday, I went to see the movie Lincoln http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0443272/.  I went to the first showing, so was out of the movie theater before 4 PM.  Yet scenes from that movie played over and over in my mind.

I watched Downton Abbey Sunday night, but could not focus on it. (I rewatched it last night online.) Scenes from Lincoln just kept intruding into my thoughts.  It was late when I finally went to bed, after watching TV, knitting and trying to shake off the intrusive thoughts.  But, they came back, in dreams, very dark dreams. 

I slept well last night. So, I am not worried about sleeping tonight.  But I find it amazing what impacts my mind.  I knew the story of Lincoln.  I knew about his marital strife, his depressive episodes, his political dealings, and of course, his assassination.  Why did that movie have such an impact on me. I do not know.  But, I know the signature of good art is to have an emotional impact on the viewers.  So, I do have to believe the movie Lincoln is good art.

A Bleak House

My house felt unusually bleak today.  I am not sure why.  But, I was out last night for the basketball games, ran errands and did chores this morning and early afternoon while the resoundingly bad Texas Tech football game http://www.texastech.com/ was on TV. It was so sad.  So, I guess after the football game, I did not have anything planned to look forward to, except to do some yard work. Which was not difficult. But I can not imagine having no plans has made this bleak feeling occur.  Usually, I look forward to the part of my weekend that does not include plans so I can read, knit, play on the computer or watch mindless TV.

I sat outside and read, and even had dinner outside and read outside after dinner.  Usually, when I come into the house, it feels warm and inviting. Tonight, it does not feel that way. 

I have some music on. There was nothing on TV I wanted to watch, and I have several books I want to read: this is not unusual.  What has changed is that I do not have the TV on while I am reading. But, I have moved to this habit more and more, and it has not made me feel so desolate.

There were clouds today, so it was a grey day, with some wind in the afternoon. It felt like a typical November day, as it should. But that should not effect the night. Of course, the clouds are obscuring the full moon.  Am I that sensitive to the changes in light?  I can not believe so.

I do not like overhead ceiling lights, and have area lights: floor lamps and table lamps, and tonight have them ablaze. 

Candles help, and I have a couple of scented candles lit.  I have to be careful with candles because of the cats.  But that is another story.

I stayed up late last night, although I was very tired when I returned home. But I was too wired to go to bed. So, it will be a later than earlier night tonight.

Maybe tomorrow I can find some cheer in my house.